This article by Fleming Education Group, LLC, was published in a recent AAML Newsletter and could be useful to parents—and the lawyers who represent them—when facing school choice issues.

School Choice in Custody Cases: How Attorneys Can Help Keep the Focus on the Child

Determining where a child will attend school can be one of the most contentious — and consequential — decisions separated or divorced parents face. While joint legal custody requires coparents to make educational decisions together, family law professionals know that these discussions often become flashpoints for deeper conflict, unilateral decision-making, and attempts to leverage school placement as a proxy for other contested issues.

Rather than staying focused on the child’s needs, we too often see parents prioritize convenience, control, or self-interest. This dynamic can derail efforts to find a workable solution and can severely strain both co-parenting relationships and children’s stability.

When School Choice Becomes a Proxy Battle

Parents frequently attempt to use a school choice dispute to achieve a broader custody-related goal. Consider the following scenario:

• A mother in a new relationship wants to move 50 miles away to enroll the child in a high-performing west suburban school district. She assumes the father will accommodate weekday transportation or concede to a parenting time change, because — after all — it’s “in the child’s best interest.”
• The father, however, files a motion to preserve the child’s enrollment in their current school, where the child is doing well academically, has a consistent peer group, and maintains close friendships.

Who’s right? How should a court decide?

These cases are rarely just about academics. More often, they’re about the underlying structure of custody, parenting time, and financial obligations. A new school may require logistical changes to transportation, extracurricular coordination, or a reconfiguration of parenting time — all of which can impact the broader balance of post-decree life. The legal system is then asked to resolve what is, in essence, a strategic shift in custody, often presented under the guise of educational opportunity.

Why Timing and Process Matter

School-related motions tend to spike in the summer months, as parents seek quick court orders before the academic year begins. Unfortunately, judicial officers are often asked to make complex decisions on short timelines and with limited information. This creates a risk that the child’s actual educational needs are sidelined in favor of expedience or legal gamesmanship.

Going Beyond the Statute: What Should Courts Consider?

While generally laws of the jurisdiction provide a starting framework for best-interest determinations, effective school placement decisions require a much deeper and more child-specific analysis. Attorneys and the courts should consider:

• The child’s individual learning style and academic needs
• Availability of specialized programming (e.g., special education, gifted and talented services)
• Each parent’s involvement in the child’s educational life
• Transportation feasibility and school start times
• Statistical performance data of proposed schools
• Continuity of peer relationships and social-emotional considerations
• Impact on the existing parenting time schedule
• Family dynamics, conflict levels, and co-parenting capacity

By expanding the scope of the conversation beyond labels and rankings, professionals can better assess whether a proposed change serves the child holistically, not just academically.

The Bigger Picture: Supporting a Child’s Stability

Research consistently shows that children thrive when their parents are aligned on educational goals and support consistent routines. The ability to collaborate on school-related matters is not only a legal obligation — it is a critical factor in a child’s academic and social success. In dissolution and custody cases, parents must be encouraged — absent contrary evidence — to approach these decisions with creativity, openness, and cooperation. Just as they must work together on decisions related to healthcare, religious upbringing, and extracurricular activities, school choice should be addressed thoughtfully and proactively.

Final Thought: Raise the Issue Early

Given the broad and lasting impact of school placement, attorneys should raise and address this issue early in any custody or parenting matter. Whether it is written into a joint custody agreement or resolved through mediation, a proactive approach helps minimize conflict and supports long-term educational stability. When we keep the focus on the child’s learning needs — not parental leverage — we fulfill our responsibility as advocates, advisors, and guardians of the child’s best interest.

Source: School Choice in Custody Cases: How Attorneys Can Help Keep the Focus on the Child (AAML Newsletter, 2025).

This article was originally published by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML) and is republished with permission.

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